My job is boring. What can I do to spice things up at the workplace?
IN NEED OF EXCITEMENT

Lord Jowlmonger VIII replies:
This reminds me of my fortnight at Standish. The then Pope Markus McGrath IV requested my company in order to discuss plans for the Lilith Fair at Kent. When not coordinating with the Steward Muldoon I found myself with ample time to enjoy the countryside. However, I soon grew weary of my prairie grass frolickings and grew quite restless. One day I went for a jaunt to the polo fields and found a considerable amount of fecal matter near the stables. My curiosity was overbearing and I plunged my hands into the droppings of what appeared to belong to the mighty steed Artex. Oh the warmth! Reminiscence of a year's Yorkshire sun! Soon I was completely inundated in joy thicker than Madam Sandra Bullock's cream tarts. My depression was cured! I spent the rest of my time scampering off to the fields every chance I got. My advice: find a private storehouse of delicious stool and it will be worth its weight in gold bullions.